Only Slightly Illiterate

Countdown: Folk Festival

2009-07-27T22:39:00.004-07:00

The Regina Folk Festival is only ten days away!
This gives me mixed feelings. My second, and last festival of the year. Last year I sold five festivals, and I'm sad that I've missed out, and will be missing out on those other three this year. Ness Creek is always a good time, and I didn't even get a chance to swing by and hang out, let alone set up shop. The Lumsden Duck Derby was new to us last year, and though we were chased into a cold community hall basement by the rain, we decided to try it again this year only to be foiled by the Nine Inch Nails concert in LA. The Craik Field Festival last year was a windy catastrophe, but I haven't seen or heard anything about one for this September.
My Partner in Crime and I were cleaned out and I were cleaned out of inventory after the Street Fair in May. And although we have had plenty of time to make new stock, we really haven't seemed to find it. She was busy getting married, and I was busy moving. She's been busy camping, and I've been busy working (Why did I take a second part time job on weekend mornings?)
Last year, after the Ness Creek Festival when I found myself cleaned out, I spent a solid three days sewing after I got back from the Pemberton Music Festival. I managed to produce enough stock for the rest of the summer, and again I'm faced with the same problem.
I'm in a situation also though, where I want to try something new. I love the purses I've been making. I adore the tie up hippie shirts made from lightweight colorful cotton. The PMS cards have so far been a bust, although I still have hopes. I've been making corsets. Strapless corsets which can be tied up in the front or the back, and ones with vest-style straps, some of which can be reversed, and some which just tie up in the front.
I think these are awesome, and I wear at least one a week myself, not just for promotion, but because I think they look dead sexy, and they're surprisingly comfortable, considering they're lined with steel boning. I often get comments. I often get stares. I often wonder how many of them will sell, or if they will turn out to be a complete bust. (pardon the pun) Is it worth it to devote much of my few remaining days to pump out a bunch of these bad-boys if nobody ends up buying them?
So far I've got fourteen purses, ten hippie shirts, six skirts, and four of each style of these corset shits. Ideally, I would like to double my stock, in case sales continue in much the same light as they did this past May.
The bonus is, I also have some pretty deadly models that I'm planning on taking out a few days before the festival, so that anything that doesn't sell then, I can throw onto my website for all y'all to peek at.

That Again

2009-07-18T17:55:00.000-07:00

I find it a little strange that, even though I don't own one of their albums, I would cross the country (and in this case, two countries) to see Nine Inch Nails.
That's right, I just got myself a ticket to go see Nine Inch Nails at the Hollywood Palladium in LA with Smyrish.
Last summer when I saw them preform at Pemberton, I was so happy and excited. True, they were playing with a bunch of other deadly ass bands I love, but they were probably my favorite act. Infact, that was the best show I have ever been to. Period. Not that I go to allot of shows very much anymore, but I've been to see some pretty deadly punk acts in my day, and NIN beat all.
I'm super stoked to be tagging along on this trip to LA that Abigail Road and Smyrish planned. (Yes, I'm THAT kind of sister) Although I'm not a fan of crowds, I don't like big cities, and we don't yet have a place to stay, I'm sure we'll have a blast, and find all sorts of outrageous trouble to get into.
Idealy, we can take that little trip, and still make it home in time for the Lumsden Duck Derby on Labor Day, so we can sell some stuffs and make some money back! Haha

Recovery

2009-07-15T17:52:00.003-07:00

I seem to have replaced the longing I feel for my recent ex-boyfriend. I may have replaced it with two hilarious habits.

Habit #1 : "Wicked fuckin' deadly"
Yes, suddenly it is the mid-nineties, and everything to me is, "wicked, wicked deadly, deadly wicked," and most ridiculously, "fuckin' deadly wicked awesome"
Habit #2: Metal Horns.
I'm sorry. There should be meetings for this. I make metal horns for everything that I find slightly awesome. Often used in conjuncture with the above mentioned habit, metal horns often involve me bending at the knees slightly and bowing my head a little to withstand the force of the all-powerful metal horns.
Hand gestures are nothing new to me. If you're in the same room as me, and I'm even a little excited about something, watch out, my hands might jump out and molest you. This is partially because I flail around when I talk, but mostly because I like to molest people.

I'm feeling okay about my new found habits though. I'm not exactly sure how they developed, although I'm sure the copious amounts of alcohol I was drinking in the two months after my breakup had a little to do with it.

Fecal Matter & Algae

2009-06-23T15:31:00.002-07:00

After my fun-filled bike-ride on Thursday, I wanted Friday to feel just as healthy, and maybe to even bigger proportions, so not only was I going to ride around the lake a few more times, I was going to go down to the marina and rent myself a kayak. For a mere $10 an hour, I could tool around the lake and take a closer look at the island, which I've never stepped foot on. I could also cool down a little on a hot day without actually having to go into the water (which isn't allowed anyways) and step on what I presume to be a super mushy goose-poo covered bottom.
I haven't kayaked in probably seven years since I was at summer camp, so I was excited to re-try one of my favorite water activities.
It was just as fun, but left me more sore-shouldered then I remember. I only needed half an hour to zigzag my way around the island, get in the way of some speed-rowers, and be jealous of the experienced kayakers, in their streamlined-super-speed machines that flew past me.
I had fun, I got wet (I'm glad I took along a plastic bag for my wallet) and deffinatly am willing to take myself again soon. I was going to go on Sunday, but thunderstorms prevailed, and left me soaking wet when I decided to chance it and walk through the park instead of ride.
Instead I made up for the calories lost by sitting around and drinking whiskey all night Saturday.

Knuckle Toes Channels the Crocidile Hunter

2009-06-21T21:01:00.008-07:00

Most of the time, I hate having more than one day off in a row.
Usually I spend my days off being productive. Doing laundry while watching the X-Files. Sewing. Buying groceries. Lately it's been packing up various areas of my house and cleaning others.
These are not things I ordinarily do after a day at work. Usually after a day at work, I'll have whiskey, watch a movie, or play Scrabble with Smyrish.
After a productive day at home, I have nothing to do the next day but feel like a lazy bum. I'll eat crackers in the couch, and sit in the crumbs bare-assed and uncomfortable.
I'm the schedule maker at work, so I don't often need to deal with a crumb-bum.
Somehow though, I ended up with Thursday and Friday off.
Determined not to let the hours crawl by, I figured I would take advantage of the fantastic weather, and ride my new bicycle, Ingrid, around our inner city man-made lake (slough)
This is not a lake for swimming. If you were to swim in this lake, you would probably smell alot like fecal matter and algae, as there doesn't seem to be any sort of filtration system.
Either way, I took Ingrid out to test her legs, and ended up riding for about two and a half hours.
I often forget that she is not a mountain bike. Infact, she doesn't have a very complex brake system (just pedal backwards) so you can't expect much in the way of shock absorbency and general toughness. Since she is currently sans-bell, I have no way to warn the walkers/joggers/stroller mommies that I'm fast approaching, so instead of rudely cutting them off, I chose to offroad it around them, and my knees are a little unhappy with me after four circuits in one afternoon.
However, I did get the great idea to go home and find my camera so I could write a lame blog entry about Canada Geese.
I don't know what they're called anywhere else in the world, and frankly, I'm too lazy to look it up. Don't let their appearance deceive you, these bastards are mean, and nothing to mess with. They hiss, they bite, and they will break your arm with one flap of their wings. Much like a grizzly with her cubs, these bastards will turn on you if you so much as look at their young. They're pretty curious though, and will stalk you around if you seem like you're going to pay any attention to them.
I also managed to watch one poop, though I didn't catch it on camera, and it was pretty fucking funny, considering it was the last thing I expected to see. It came out like a graceful little green arc that you might see come out of a fountain. Of shit. And believe me, there is goose-poop EVERYWHERE in the park. (Which by the way, is the largest inner-city park in the world, if I remember correctly) Somewhere in it is actually a bird sanctuary, which surprise surprise, is pretty much full of these Canada Geese. Although, it seems there's a few pelicans as well.

Packing

2009-06-09T20:42:00.000-07:00

A couple things make me happy about moving.

One of them is being able to go through all of my shit (and there’s allot of it) and organize it. It also gives me a chance to get rid of a bunch of shit. Somehow over the years I ended up with three lava lamps. That’s right, THREE lava lamps. Even though I probably haven’t had any of them set up or turned on in five years, I felt the need to keep them all, and move around with them (probably three or four times) while they were being infinitely useless in a milk crate.
I just spend two and a half hours going through my hall closet, bedroom closet and my bookshelves. I ended up with three big shipping bags of things to get rid of, and about seven or eight boxes of stuff to move with. I find it crazy that I, a single, twenty year old woman, could possible own as much shit as I do.

Another thing I like about moving is the idea that I can put whole new rooms together. Like any slightly domesticated woman, I like making things pretty! I like deciding where to put my couch, my slightly broken folding screen, my crazy colored glass friendship orb, and my giant hand-me-down gun rack. Maybe one of the reasons I own so much shit is because I like to decorate. I don’t NEED to own a floor rug, but I do. I don’t NEED to own a massive dining room table that seats six, but I do. Infact, I sort of am moving to a bigger apartment because I didn’t want to replace said table with a sewing space.

I’ve got two and a half weeks to pack up my apartment, clean the joint, and take all the stuff away that I’m finally getting rid of. I get a couple days off to go to Smalltown for Abigail’s wedding, party it up with the booze hounds, and then it’s back here with a day and a half to spare for that whole physically moving all my heavy, heavy stuff.

Woo!

Moving

2009-06-07T13:40:00.000-07:00

I’m moving!

I found myself a great little two bedroom apartment in the same building as Schmutzie and Abigail, so I am foreseeing some random coffee parties with some pickup Scrabble games coming my way.
Also, for the first time, I will have my very own craft room (wow, I suddenly feel like a lonely sixty year old scrap-booker) where I can make all the sewing messes I want! Where I don’t have to face an empty corner and sew in gross phoney lighting. Where I can have room to organize my fabric properly and maybe have more space to get shit done, displayed, properly photographed, and maybe even sold! A space that is not my living room sofa for me to use my new laptop, though I’ll probably be just as unmotivated.
Now I’ll need to invest in some fancy-ass curtains if I want to keep running around my house naked. Now whenever I’m bored I can sit by my new fireplace (eee!) and gaze out the window as stabbing victims stagger to the emergency ward of the local hospital. Now I’ll have a neato walkout door/window to a courtyard where people smoke, drink coffee and hang their laundry to dry.

I see myself actually starting to buy groceries and cooking for myself again. I see myself letting go of all that shitty break-up stuff I’ve finally been starting to deal with in the last two months. I see myself sewing more. I see myself doing all that cheesy ass home maker bullshit stuff and having people over for tacky wine parties.
Woo!

2009-05-26T17:44:00.000-07:00

Woo! The first festival/street fair of the year was a success. More than a success actually, because now my Partner in Crime and I have to basically make an entire new stock. We were left with only a dozen or so purses between the both of us, and a few shirts, a few skirts, and one dress.
We sold items yesterday that we had almost given up on. Wrap pants I made four years ago and could never quite display properly, simple bags we had thrown together with weird looking fabrics which we’d slowly marked down over the years, and tank tops which I was unsure would fit anybody except maybe that anorexic Olson Twin.
It’s amazing how much proper mannequins help sales. It’s great to see how every year our booth comes together a little more. Last season I managed to “borrow” a roll bar and mannequin from that hellhole clothing store I worked at, and manage not to return them before the company shut down all the stores. The too bad part about that was, I was invited back to take a couple more of each, but became lazy and forgot. Abigail managed to buy some cheap mannequins from a lady who switched from selling clothing at those girly house party things, to selling Tupperware.
Both of use have basically given up on selling jewelery, which doesn’t seem to be much of a loss, because it looks like everybody makes and sells jewelery now, and I just don’t care.

Im finding it strange though, how we can have such a great day, and yet I had such a bad one at the same time.
It was beautiful out side, sunny, hot, not a cloud in the sky (which is the exact opposite of the weather we’ve had so far this spring) There were people everywhere, and we sold more than we had expected to sell. Many people took our business cards to check out what else we’d be putting up online. Somebody even asked me about the corset shirts I’ve started making and said that something like that would be perfect for her grad outfit.
To be honest, the people everywhere were driving me insane. I only managed to leave the booth once or twice to go to the potty and get a henna tattoo, but every time there were more than three or four people looking at our things, I would have these strange sort of panic attacks and not be able to deal with the situation. To cure this, I got drunk on cheap white wine at the community centre, and watched a pretty wicked French Canadian band do their thing. I also didn’t eat dinner, after only eating a footlong smokey and a poutine from Mr. Spuds, all day.

No More Coffee

2009-05-22T23:37:00.001-07:00

The other night, when I got home from drinking the molten-lava-chai-thing at the coffee shop, I suddenly had a burst of creative energy, and over zealously did a bunch of strange random things.
I decided that I would feel really important if I used my briefcase, so I filled it with stationary, receipts, and various items I would need for the festivals that we attend.
Then I re-organized one of the steamed trunks to fit all of the items we would need for displaying things (tablecloths, baskets, easels, etc.) although that now leaves me two steamer trunks worth of merch to fit into one trunk.
Then I made a bunch of signs using crazy hyped-up coffee scribbles and a really wonderful pen that Smyrish gave me. These signs seemed like a really good idea at the time, but really make me feel kind of silly (even though I’ll still totally use them) I feel they really show off my personality as an artist (right) they say things like:
“HEY LOOK! PMS cards for $3-!!”
along with a stupid stick-drawing-esq. scribble of a card with an angry looking figure that happens to be shaking a really tiny fist. Beside this, an arrow points to the inside of the card and says “sassy sayings inside”
Then I made a sign that says
“HEY NEAT!! $5 Rings”
along with a terrible drawing of a ring, that doesn’t look anything like a ring, and an arrow pointing at that ring that says “I guess this is supposed to be a ring”

Medicate me now.

PMS Cards

2009-05-21T14:21:00.002-07:00

After realizing that I lost a bunch of stock which I probably wouldn’t have sold anyways, I ran over to the photo lab to see if I could make a re-go at whole PMS Apology Card line, which originally met a peely doom after an unnamed party told me it would be perfectly fine to use a plain white glue stick to put together my product.
Plain white glue does not like humidity, and for some reason it didn’t occur to me that maybe if I put the cards into those individual protector Sealy pack things, they might not only withstand the elements, but not get dirty and bent up.
Either way, what happened was this:
The photo lab was closed, and therefore couldn’t help me. So I took my handy new laptop (which I bought for business in the first place) down to the coffee shop, bought myself a $5 soy-chai-whatever-the-fuck-yuppie-latte-thing-that’s-always-boiling-hot-like-molten-lava-and-never-cools-off-because-of-the-foam.
I sat down on the couch and spent the next short while cursing at the slow internet wireless I was not paying for, trying to track down decent pictures from my Etsy shop that I could get Filmstar to crop down and print out for me, so I can make a new line of PMS cards, featuring pictures of angry women, sassy sayings, held together with acid free photo tabs, and individually sealed in wasteful flimsy plastic envelopes.
Finally, I’m motivated on a project. I seem to be full of ideas, with no get-up-and-go.

Woo for run-on sentence paragraphs! (I writes like I’s talks in real lifes)

Festival Woes

2009-05-19T20:30:00.001-07:00

I haven’t been sewing lately.
The fact that my sewing machine is jammed into a small corner nook in my bedroom might have something to do with it. The fact that the only natural light in the room shines into the opposite corner of my tiny cramped sewing nook might have something to do with it. The fact that my sewing nook has become overgrown with piles of partially finished projects, my jewelery box, as well as clothing that needs to be mended, might have something to do with it. The fact that I’ve been super unmotivated, depressed, and often drunk, might have something to do with it
Mostly, I told myself that I had enough product for the upcoming street fair I’ll be selling at with my Partner in Crime. I told myself, “When I see what’s selling best, and what people like, I’ll be excited and motivated to make more”
Instead of planning for days and days all the different layouts we could set up our booth with this year, I’ve slacked off, and haven’t unpacked any of my creations from their steamer trunks until tonight. Many of my wares need to be ironed and made wrinkle free (even though tossing them back into the boxes and packing them into the back of a car won’t have any positive effect on newly ironed purses)
I also realized something important.
When I needed to move all of my things from the old storage room in the basement, to the new storage locked in the laundry room, it seems I didn’t move my corkboards full of jewelery. This means, some scavenger at the dump probably lucked out and is running around in all my necklaces and bracelets. These didn't sell well anyways, and I was about to write them off as a lost cause, but the beads were nice, and probably could have been salvaged. All of those pretty blown glass beads, all those hours of hand-woven labour, and those prettier items that could have been used as gifts or probably would have sold when displayed differently (away from the shoddy looking beginners stuff)
Go me!

Bicycle

2009-05-18T15:07:00.001-07:00

I got a new bicycle! After two years of pouting after my wonderful, albeit stolen bicycle, Enid, I’ve finally found a suitable replacement. And by I found, I mean my the lovely Smyrish and Filmstar picked it up on their trip to Smalltown over this weekend.
Not red but blue, with a white basket and shiny fenders, Ingrid is a wonderful new addition to my already crowded apartment.
Like with Enid, the brake system is simple, pedal backwards. Sometimes, this can be a hindrance, because once you hit maximum speed on the bike, all pedal resistance disappears and there’s no going faster, but I don’t need to worry about the brake lines failing, or the gears slipping the chain off when I switch them. Infact, the less bells and whistles with things, the better.
I said the same for my cell phone, I said the same for my laptop, and I said the same for my digital camera. The less shit I need to deal with, and worry about fucking up, the better.
I don’t need to spend ½ an hour riding to work in the mornings anymore, but there’s not much I like better than biking around in the summertime, alone, or partnered, with or without destination.
Also, this is another inexpensive thing to keep me from jumping out my window, and sitting in front of a screen watching TV on DVD from the library.
I already have a pretty painful bum bruise.

Knitting

2009-05-16T22:44:00.001-07:00

My boyfriend recently dumped me.
It sucks ass, and I still feel like jumping off a bridge. For shizzle.
But, I'm not here for the pity party, I'm here to tell you about the wonderful thing my friend Schmutzie inspired me to do.
It was one of those shitty long days off, where my brain was running in circles, and I was going to go nutty if I couldn't keep my mind off of things. The two of us went for breakfast, and I stalked/followed/accompanied her to the yarn store (which only slighty out of the way from my house) and as I watched her pick out some wacky burgundy yarn and jabber about the purse she would make with it, a light bulb went off in my head.
If I distracted myself with some sticks, string and some readin' then I could be productive and numb at the same time!
A few slipped stitches later, and I just finished my first real project last week. A scarf (surprise surprise!) in green, orange and brown. Just in time for summer.
Anyways, thanks to Debbie Stoller's, "Stitch 'n Bitch" I might have another type of crafty thing (eww) I can dump onto my booths at the festival and into my Etsy shop.

Garbage Man

2009-05-14T15:32:00.002-07:00

Spring's finally sprung.
In the shoe (or any retail business) this generally means sending out a bunch of flyers displaying the hot picks from this new season.
Some people, myself included, don't necessarily appreciate tonnes of colored paper being packed into a solid mass inside their mailboxes. Most of these people put signs up with tacky rhymes such as "Save the trees, no flyers please." Some of the paper boys, either just don't give a shit, or ignore these signs out of spite.
Not my problem.
So I'm at work, and the phone rings. Of course, I answer. A very polite man asks me to repeat my name, and then mentions that he received a copy of our flyer earlier that morning.
Assuming he had a question about one of the items, I replied that we had just received a copy of that flyer ourselves in the mail, so I had a quick reference if he needed any help.
At this points, he screams into the phone that the next time we stuffed any of that garbage into his mailbox again, he was going to march down the the store and pour garbage all over me.
Realizing this was a situation I didn't particularly need to diffuse, I exclaimed into the phone, "SWEET! I love garbage!" and promptly hung up. (Looking back on the situation, I should have put on a porno voice and told him garbage was so dirty and got me all hot and bothered)

It also occurred to me afterwards...
Does this guy really have nothing better to do on his time, than call me up and work and threaten me over a flyer? Did he assume that I personally dropped off all the papers and rush back to the store to answer phone calls? Did he phone the drug stores, department stores, electronics boutiques and utility companies as well? Is he a recovering shoe-fetishist who nearly fell off the wagon when he saw those sexy sexy old lady shoes?

Who does that?

Blog Mark II

2009-05-13T18:34:00.004-07:00

I live!
I spent the better half of a year sneaking internet for five minute spurts at work and the library accross the park. Needless to say, that was not conducive to blogging, maintaining my Etsy shops, or doing anything more exciting than playing free online games and checking the odd email.
Last night I broke down and bought my very first personal computer, a shiny new navy blue beauty for $600.
Judging by the fact that I've accidentally published this post about 5 times so far tells us, that I'm still getting used to this keyboard, and these strange keys that for some reason have different uses than regular keys on normal keyboards.
Back to my point, I blogged, I didn't, and now Im thinking about blogging again.
So how's that, huh? .
Stay tuned

Status: Alive

2008-10-01T15:30:00.001-07:00

I just wanted to let y'all know...
I'm not dead,
I just don't like you.

translation:
I don't have the internet and I only make it down to the library for half an hour or so a week, because I am lazy and it is two whole blocks out of my way.

How 'bout the Weather

2008-08-22T08:52:00.002-07:00

I am not normaly one to talk, or god forbid blog, about the weather. But here goes:
Today, it is raining. It is not drizzling, nor is their some sort of storm. But, it sure is windy, and that waters's stinky and coming down hard.
Today, I walked to work in the rain. Concidering that I live three blocks away, normaly this is relativly painless. Of course though, since it is a shitty day and I have to walk to work as per usual, I was not coming from home, I was coming from about thirty to fourty minutes away, and had to walk in the rain under a small umbrella with somebody else.
Halfway through I gave up the umbrella. "Fuck it," I said, "I'm only half under, and the rain is just pouring down one side onto my head and shoulder. I have a change of clothes in my backpack, I'll be fine"
Now's about the time when we add the variables.
One: I am crippled. Most days I feel fine, but today, of course, I can barely bring myself to walk because my knees and hips are so swollen.
Two: I am wearing new shoes that havent quite broken in. This of course means that I have a large bleeding sore or two on my foot and cant put weight on it.

After hobbling into work only slightly late this morning, I run into the back room and peel (literaly) my heavy, wet clothes off my body, hoping that my work clothes will only feel a little clammy once I get them on.
Nope. The water soaked through my backpack onto the crotch of my cream-colored pants, and all over one side of my dress shirt. So really, it looks very much like I peed myself, sweat excessivly and have lactated all over the place.
Not to mention of course, that when I took my shoes off, my white ankle socks were stained a nice water-logged blood color in the back.
Wish me luck!

I Dislike Folk Festival

2008-08-12T14:19:00.003-07:00

Over the last couple years I have noticed a decrease in the Regina Folk Festivals traffic.
Over the last couple years I have noticed a decrease in the Regina Folk Festivals good bands.
Over the last couple years I have noticed a decrease in the Regina Folk Festivals vendor sales.
Over the last couple years I have noticed an increase in the Regina Folk Festivals Ticket Prices.
Over the last couple years I have realized that spending $150 for a weekend to hang out in a small park down the street from my house is a huge waste of money, when I can spend half as much to go to the Ness Creek Festival, see some great bands, have camping included, be near a beach and have a blast. Also, when the biggest Folk Festivals, like Calgary and Winnipeg, can charge admission for one-third of the price of Regina Folk, and have 5 times as many attendees.
If I didn't make some money this year selling (not much mind you, but some) I might not want to go back next year.

T-minus 4 Days

2008-08-05T10:28:00.004-07:00

Somehow, somehow I made about twenty purses in three days.
That is more productive than I have been in about three months. Not to mention made a bunch of magnets (which maybe I will actualy put on display this year) and I have a few record CD organizers ready to to be put together. It looks like I might not need to panic anymore, though I would like to get a few more purses put together before Friday when we set up.
I've also redone all my jewelry displays with a black backdrop, instead of that awful beige and tie-died blue. It's really not all that surprising that the black makes all the earrings, necklaces and pendants look 100 times better.
I'm almost broke, and I sort of really cant wait until Folk Festival next weekend, partialy because I think I'll do really well this year in sales, but mostly because is signifies the end to a summer that turned out to be pretty hectic durring the times when I wasn't laid back watching it fly by.
I'm hoping too, when it's all said and done, I will be able to refill my etsy shop with new product, because I've been neglecting it for months.
Good luck to me!

Flaming Lips : Not Just a sign of Ghonnerea Anymore

2008-07-31T13:02:00.002-07:00

So, I love The Flaming Lips.
Maybe not with a firey passion of a thousand exploding suns, but pretty darn close.
Now I have one more reason to love The Flamimg Lips: the preformance they put on.
Never before have I seen anybody more excited to be preforming for a crowd, than I did this weekend when they came out and entertained us throughout the soundcheck with cannons full of confetti, gigantic floating balloons, and even putting a member of the band into a gargantous plastic-inflatable ball and rolling him around the crowd.
Colorful gases and confetti exploded through the crowd while lights of every which color blinded us as we cheered, sang along, danced, and had the most fun we'd had all day in the scortching sun, and dry dusty fields with too many crowds and overflowing potta-potties.
Thank you Flaming Lips, thanks a bunch!

Nine Inches of all Nail

2008-07-26T11:25:00.002-07:00

I have to say, Trent Reznor puts on a fucking good show!
All sorts of crazy lighting and video was set up all over the stage, and there was so much energy in the air.
Somehow I made it into the fenced off section right infront of the stage. I didn't think I'd make it that far in, but there I was, waterbottle in one hand, cell phone in the other, glasses on my face, and no pockets to put them in. Somehow I rigged up a utility belt with a scarf I had bought earlier in the day, roped my phone in place with a hairband, threw my glasses in the waterfilled "womb" of my water bottle, and stomped my way into the circle pit.
Now, I've been to alot of punk shows. I've been to a few metal shows, and I was expecting to get the shit beaten out of me from all sides.
I was in awe the whole time, I was the only woman in the circle pit. Where were all the other broads?
Here's me, in my flowing green hippy skirt, matching halter top, green sparking scarf, and my new hiking shoes, beating the snot out of sweaty, half naked metal heads and punk rockers.
When the finaly realized they could use full force without hurting me, I was in my element. I had a few stares, being little wood-nymph hippie-esq, and a few people would turn to me between songs and tell me I was fucking crazy.
I've built some serious street cred.
Plus, none of these people know me, and currently all believe that my tooth was knocked out last night at the show. Honestly, I got hit in the mouth so hard, right where my tooth was, had it not been taken out this spring, it would have come out right then and there, I've got a swollen lip, and it totaly hurts to talk, eat, and be merry.
More updates later friends, today the linup goes:
Sam Roberts Band
Some band I'm not intrested in (aka, nap time)
Tragically Hip
Flaming Lips
Tom Fucking Petty

Merch

2008-07-16T13:08:00.000-07:00

I've made a decision.
Finaly, after three years of practice, I have perfected the over-the-shoulder, messenger style bag with the flap. Alot of people like the flap. My partner in crime and I had some dissapointed returning customers this May when we didn't have any purses with flaps for sale.

So I have perfected, not only a lined purse, with a lined flap, and a reversable strap (with lining and outer fabrics) I have perfected rolling all of these into one pretty grand purse.
A purse which will be the norm from now on, I says.

Which brings me to my next decisions. I'm going to stop making shirts, for now.
I'm sick of dealing with shirt displays, hauling mannequins, dealing with hangers, with the ribbons I need to make the shirts tie up (and always tangle together) I'm sick of not being able to sell as many as I can make, so I'm giving up shirts, and focusing on purses and record books from now on.

I'm also sick of bending wire. All I can seem to come up with is uninspiring, mostly looking pretty alike pendants and earrings. I love making jewelry, I love to sell it, and sometimes, it does sell, but not as often as anything else. Also, again, I hate dealing with the display end of things. I always loose one earring, or accidently bend a necklace, or else something is falling over. I hate it, and I'm not dealing with it anymore.

Too bad.

2008-07-15T10:39:00.003-07:00

I just thought I would strop in and say:
"Goodbye world"
My roommate and I will be out of reach for approximatly two weeks, with maybe a stop back for a day and a half in the middle, between festivals.
I'll be having a market booth up at the Ness Creek Festival this weekend, and next weekend we'll be in BC for Pemberton, where I will get to see such awesome people as Tom Petty, Nine Inch Nails, The Flaming Lips, Tragically Hip, and Sam Roberts Band.
So, tomorrow, at approximatly 4:30pm, PocketBuddha and I will be fecking off, we hate all of you, and have a great end-of-July!

Stuff I Likes

2008-07-10T10:41:00.006-07:00

Four or five years ago I bought a necklace and ring I grew so attached to, I never took them off willingly. When I was asked to take them off, so as not to offend visiting family members, I would wrap them around my ankle.
Whenever I was stressed or needed grounding, I would grab hold of the pendant and feel the heat that the pewter had absorbed. Sort of like a rosary, my necklace would calm me in times of need.
Then one day, for some probably trivial reason, I took off the necklace, and it was promptly stolen by my (ex)boyfriend. So of course, I never saw it again.
I gave up hope replacing the necklace when I called the store I had purchased it from, and they no longer carried the company that made it. I gave up hope replacing the ring when the man from the store I bought the ring from asked me why on earth I would want them to order me in a satanic ring. Instead of getting into it, I walked out.
About two years ago I randomly remembered the name of the company that made my necklace, and lo and behold, they were on the internets, and available to order! Of course, I had to wait to get a paypal account, and possibly some sort of Visa, which didn't happen until about a year ago.
Then, of course, I had problems with the ordering, through a glitch in their website, and didn't get around to contacting them until last week.
Now, theres nothing better than purchasing something you've been dying for when you're having a shitty week.
So, hopefully before I take off for a two-week long mystical journey through western Canada with PocketBuddha, I will have something to hang onto and remind me that life it totaly worth going through.
Moral of story: Online purchases always make you feel better when you've had a shitty day (or three. Because everybody knows, the more you own, the better person you are)

Just to Clarify...

2008-06-27T10:37:00.001-07:00

I thought maybe I should let you all know.
Though my last two posts have included pee-pee and poo, I have not digressed to a 4 year old child.

Pee and Sunglasses

2008-06-25T09:47:00.003-07:00

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you feel twinges in your crotch?
I do.
Or maybe it's just because I really have to pee and I was stood up by my co-worker.
Either way, I decided to pass the three long, peeless hours by looking at Flickr photos my friends had taken, and I stumbled upon one from last summer taken by the lovely Ms. Abigail Road, and my heart stopped a little.Earlier that season I accidentally stole a pair of sunglasses from Value Village that I put on as a joke and kept on because they looked so darn good on me. Later that season they had become quite bent, the screws were loose, and the tinting had worn off the centers of the lenses due to putting them face-down on the picnic table all summer long.
I swear I kept them anyways, planning on getting the lenses re-tinted, or even replaced with prescription lenses. When I went to get new glasses the other week, I spent a few hours going through my mostly unpacked boxes, looking for the bitches, to no avail.
This morning after seeing this glorious picture of me and my fake-papa, I decided to check out E-bay and see if I could find a pair close to what I had. And look! I found my sunglasses, never worn, like new, and I can almost afford them with my PayPal balance.
I want I want I want so bad I could cry!

Poop

2008-06-24T09:45:00.000-07:00

Spawned by Schmuztie's post about Mass Pooping, I thought I would follow up my last post about food, very appropriately with a post about poop.
I seem to be the only person I know who is not disconcerted about "making a poo" in public. I hear men say they would never do it if they didn't have to. It makes me wonder, is it because they're uncomfortable with their assholes in public? Or is it because they don't want to sit on the seat?
Because maybe it doesn't occur to them, that because women go to the bathroom in herds, not only are our bathrooms way dirtier, but we have to sit on the seat, no matter what we're doing into it.
But I digress.
The point was to tell you that I seem to be the only person I've met who sort of enjoys pooping in public. Why not? I'll give you a few reasons:
1. It totally makes you feel as though you've marked your territory
2. It makes you more comfortable with your body, and less ashamed of it's functions. As if nobody else out there is pooping? Does nobody else using the mall bathroom ever need to squeeze one out every now and then? Yes, yes they do.
3. If you make a bit of a mess, you don't necessarily need to clean it up. Don't get me wrong. Walking into the stall and seeing somebody else's poo, totally turns me off. Don't poop and run. But if you happen to have one that squirts a little, or leave a bit of a skid on the bottom of the ceramic, you don't need to worry about having to wipe it off later.

Moral of story: Poop proudly!

Got Weed?

2008-06-20T12:56:00.007-07:00

I've always known that there were uses for Dandelions.
What I didn't know was the extent of said uses, and the health benefits of these so called weeds. Apparently they are great for relief of cramps, gastro-intestinal irritations (yum,) headaches, joint pain and skin conditions. Apparently they also help with breast illnesses, and are full with all sorts of vitamins I'm too lazy to name.
Last night on a whim we decided to pull up all those little bitches and make some dandelion tea, and it got me wondering what else I could do with those little yellow flowers.
I found a recipe similar to one Saviabella had made last year with zucchini flowers.
Not to mention, dandelion wine, salads (including dressing), coffees, teas, soups, syrups, cakes, bread, pancakes, baklava's, and even an ice cream.
I find it funny, because I spent most of my life believing that there was a part of the flower that was poison.
Either way, I really want to try out a few of these recipes. If anything they make a neat story.
By the way, the tea tasted like sugar snap peas, once we added a little bit o' brown sugar.

Food

2008-06-16T14:51:00.003-07:00

As you all should know, there is nothing I love better than food.
Thats right, food. I love to shop for it, I love to prepare it, I love to smell it, I love to feed it to people, and I love to eat it.
Unfortunately, I love food so much, and I am so lazy, that I've spent one-bajillion dollars (thats a fact!) on lazy-man food. Takeout, delivery and being waited upon are something I have gotten way to used to in the last three or four months, and I've had enough.
So I took the plunge, and spent a shitload of money on groceries. What I wasn't planning on was how little said groceries would make.

Plan: Spend a little extra money on organic produce
Sudden too-late realization: Extra money on less food, healthy in theory and practice, painful on pocketbook. Makes me want to eat slightly less, which could be a good thing considering how much of a glutton I can be, but I just wind up wanting snacks.

Plan: Cook continuously for a few days, making soups, breads, curries, burritos etc. to freeze until feeding time.
Sudden-too-late realization: Cooking three things at once is stressful, so is realizing you are short the odd ingredient every ingredient. Also, batches of soup never seem to make as much as I think, I always think I'll get like 6 servings out of something, one I can eat, and five I can freeze. It never works that way. Somehow I only end up with two or three. Also, dishes! ('nuff said)

Plan: Cook all the foods I want.
Sudden-too-late realization: One whole onion, will not make three recipes needing one whole onion each. Duh. I didn't buy enough!

When it comes to me, cooking ahead for myself is great in theory, but maybe I should just make one meal at a time from now on, and just keep myself stocked up on the basics, buying the good stuff only when I know I want it.

Octopussy

2008-06-09T12:57:00.006-07:00

Look at the image downwards.
Cute no? A little tiny, fits in the palm of your hand, sized vibrator called the "Screaming O" came into my possession within the last month. He's pretty neat, being as he's portable, waterproof, and sure has allot of built up energy.
That good looking naked boy has named him "Seafood" which irks me a little, but makes me laugh all the same.
Anyways, this post is not necessarily about the good looking naked boy, or the name of my pocket-sized silicon friend. This post is about my, apparently very large and cavernous, vagina.Once upon a time, I was hangin' out, doin' my thing, and was told, "Something is wrong here, this can't be, lets try this again"
So I tried to take it out, failing it realize it would be a little slippery. So I pushed. Really really hard, all I could do was pee a little.
I stood in front of the mirror laughing. I wasn't in discomfort, as there are no nerve endings past the first four or five inches of the "canal" But I could however hear a buzzing, and when I put my hand to my stomach, I could feel an odd vibrating.
Then it occurred to me, in a sudden moment of realization (as these things often occur to me) that the pull-string you see coming from the top of his head, was facing up.
So, much like breach birth, I needed to fiddle around for five minutes with a chopstick in order to turn the head to face downwards, and push this tiny little guy out of me.
Great!

Market Booth

2008-05-27T14:08:00.003-07:00

After my hot/cold/awesome/sucky weekend, I got a neat-o phone message from the woman in charge of the Vendor Area at the Ness Creek Music Festival, in which she told me, "Sorry it took so long to get back to you, but you are totally accepted for this years festival."
So after thinking that this summer might be a bust as far as selling at festivals goes, this comes up and absolutely makes my day, it's another $150 out of my pocket, but that includes my ticket, which would have been half of that on it's own. Plus, unlike the other festivals, the market itself is located right across from the main-stage, underneath a permanent rain-shelter, which means I will have to deal with allot less of what Abigail Road and I dealt with on Saturday.
I am so excited that I squealed like a little girl and did a crazy happy-dance while I listened to the phone-message.
My only downfall is transportation. I haven't quite figured out how I'll be getting myself up there, not to mention my display tent, table, and two small hand-held steamer-trunks full of stuff. (And that's a downsize, usually I bring along at least a milk crate or two full of other odds and ends)
Anybody out there on their way up this year with a bit of extra room?

Quote of the Day

2008-05-26T10:12:00.004-07:00

We interrupt this family broadcast for the most magnificent quote of the day, brought to you by one of the funniest people I know, and the letter "Q"
"It's either face-first into the honey pocket, or we're takin' out the garbage"

F-U-N

2008-05-25T20:38:00.002-07:00

One sunny Saturday morning I woke up with a smile on. The sun was shining, it was just a little cool, I'd gotten laid the night before, it was my day off, and I had an arts festival to attend. I parted ways with friends, hopped on my bike, and hauled ass to the snobby part of town to enjoy a day outside with my Partner in Crime.
My brother and I bickered a little as we set up the tent my mum lent us, but all was well in festival land.
Then the wind began. The tent started to blow away, the displays toppled, the tablecloth flapped around, and the beautiful folding screen full of earrings took a near-fatal tumble.
Being sick of literally holding down the fort, Abigail and I sent the boys on a $20 shopping spree for heavy-ass bags of softener salt to hold down the tent.
An hour later we realized, the tent just had to go.
So here we are, sitting on the curb (did I mention we had no lawn chairs) with rollbars and a table randomly thrown into the street in front of us, and a large mess of boxes, undisplayable jewelry, broken display boards and random shit we did not want to deal with.
Things ended up alright. We made a few sales, gave out a few cards, were interviewed for the Newspaper, and smoked our faces off.
Then the sky began to spit.
Then the heavens opened up, and it began to rain.
Cold, windy, overcast rain.
So, we waited in the rain for half an hour for the boys to come with the car so we could get the fuck outta dodge.
And of course, once we got out of dodge, it stopped raining.
And I got my period.

I hate May.

Alien vs. Predator

2008-05-18T11:43:00.007-07:00

disclaimer: I feel the need to let you know in advance that there is a very graphic picture to follow.
Compare.
Vagina vs. Alien
People ask me about my last post, and how it's possible I can be afraid of an organ that I am so proud of. How can I, a person who can talk so openly about tits, clits, cocks, twats, licks and dicks, have some sort of fear of vaginas?
Look at the pictures again. It's like some form of, moist, sticky, ribbed sort of species that will devour you whole.
Did you ever see the movie Alien? Do you remember the part where the alien spawn latched itself onto peoples faces and used them as a host to reproduce? Yeah, thats exactly how I feel about it. This is my version of vagina dentata.

This post has been brought to you by the letter V.
V
Vvvvelvet
Vvvvulva
Vvvvagina

Did You Know...

2008-05-12T09:25:00.004-07:00

Are you aware, that not only am I a horrible, man crushing succubus, but I am also totally a dyke?
Apparently it is well know that I have been secretly sleeping with my roommate for years, before, during and after my long term relationship with Jukebox Hero.
I'm glad this has been brought to my attention. I'm glad that now, I am finally aware that I not only have been sleeping with women, now I know exactly which woman I have been sleeping with. What I am not aware of, is if it's good sex or not. Maybe somebody can enlighten me. Is my gay sex with my roommate good? It seems that the general public knows allot more about about my personal life than I do.
I find it funny, considering, if you look at us individually, this recipe calls for disaster.
Subject A, may be kind of dykey. Subject A is also known to basically hate every person she has slept with, immediately afterwards.
Subject B, though can find women attractive, is not necessarily attracted to women, and also, happens to be afraid of vaginas.
I just wanted to give a big "fuck you" out there, to anybody who truly believes that:
a) I am a horrible man-eating succubus
b) If I did happen to be a lesbian, I would find it necessary to lie about it to everybody for no apparent reason
c) My friends and I are incapable of making our own, grown up decisions.

My Utopia is not Your Utopia

2008-05-08T15:44:00.009-07:00

Happiness is... the patio up on a warm spring afternoon
Happiness is... a freshly polished pair of combat boots
Happiness is... a hideous pink 10-speed bicycle with floral fabric over the seat and handlebars, making it look like I've hit an old baba at top speed.
Happiness is... going to punk shows the night before your day off
Happiness is... a neat new bracelet made from an old fork
Happiness is... friends coming back from trips, and planning new trips
Happiness is... seeing green shoots on the trees
Happiness is... the circle pit at top speed
Happiness is... the last green jelly bean
Happiness is... ignoring all the bullshit drama surrounding your friends and family, because they're going to do what they're going to do, and it's nobody else's business, or fault, they can make their own decisions. At least it's not hard drugs
Happiness is... riding your bicycle with a friend at top speed, drunk through the dark at one in the morning
Happiness is... getting laid in the morning
Happiness is... a cold drink on a warm night with friends

Jobus Huntus

2008-04-29T11:10:00.004-07:00

Thanks to some lovely advise from my mother, I am on the lookout again for a job.
As much as I love love love my job as shoe-sales-extraordinare, it looks like I'm going to need something casual or part time in order to make ends meet this summer. Between Pocket Buddha's and my Grand Adventure of Excellent Proportions, the various folk festivals that my Partner and Crime and I will be hawking our wares at, the camping trips I'm sure I'll be 'dragged' out on, and drinking those hot days away on the patio, I'm going to be one broke-ass this summer.
Therefore, here I am again, making a fancy-lookin' resume, handing it out at the various snobby coffee-shops downtown, and hoping that somebody will look into their heart and hire the curvy girl with the funny looking hair to do their dirty work for them.
Who wouldn't want to hire a part-time employee with limited hours, lots of days needed off throughout the busy-times, and a slack-ass-attitude?

8-Bits of Freedom

2008-04-26T09:46:00.007-07:00

Do you know what is truly wonderful and glorious?
And I use glorious in an offhanded term, because said thing will not actually bring me glory, but I just really like that word.
Pink Floyd and Nintendo.
To be specific, Syd Barret era Pink Floyd, and Dragon Warrior.
For 6 hours on your day off, when you realize that you're sewing machine(s) won't work, you're room is clean, you're not hungry, your pets are fed, plants watered, and theres nobody around for you to screw, Nintendo can be a great alternative.
Plus, when you run out of Pink Floyd, you can always turn to the Ramones, and old old school AFI, from before they sold out and turned all emo.
What a combination.
And I so know what I will be doing tonight when I come home from work before I go out to listen to live Jazz at the local art-wanker bar where Schmutzie like to feed me green drinks so I get belligerent.

Wow, this post skipped around worse then an ADD kid riding a lawn mower.
PS, according to whatever dictionary Blogger uses, wanker is not a real word. Woot.
PPS, speaking of Nintendo, look what I bought from LostMitten the other week! (points to picture)

Life and Times

2008-04-22T10:26:00.002-07:00

I'm alive!
...and I'm in a feel-good mood, not only because I woke up next to a good looking naked boy, and I just had breakfast, but because I spent most of my day yesterday sewing, which is something I have not done in awhile. Also, I feel good because I totally needed to get a big run-on sentence out of the way.
Run-on sentences to me, are like pooping. Once a day you need to drop a big one and get it out of your way.
But, I digress.
I haven't really sewn in, I'm going to say close to three months, and oh boy did it feel nice to complete not just half an item, but five whole items. I stopped for an hour lunch break with family and friends, but I basically trucked right through from 9-5 and make a small (very small) dent in my fabric.
Like my Partner in Crime, I have decided to do a quality over quantity thing, and since my sereger is currently on the kaputz, I've been doubling up almost every seam, and making sure there's no rough cuts.
Quality going up on our items means not having to feel so bad to charge an extra five bucks for something. Quality going up on more items means items not looking bad next to poorer quality items from years past. Quality going up means potentially less items, but better lookin' ones.
Once it gets nicer outside I might thieve Jukebox Hero for a camera session in the park so I can throw some stuff up on my Etsy.
Folk Festivals here I come!

Don't Panic

2008-04-11T14:53:00.003-07:00

Once, when I was in grade 9, I hitchhiked to a nearby town and ate some acid with a guy named Dylan, who looked alot like a young Bob Dylan.
Three years later, I once again found myself on the side of the highway, on my way to Cosmopolis to visit an [ex] boyfriend.
Later that summer I was on my way again, further north to a grand ol' folk festival.

I've lain dormant for three years. My green surplus backpack has felt lonely and betrayed, but once again it shall feel the warmth of the sun and the sweat of my back. Pocket Buddha and I have planned the "Grand Adventure of Epic Proportions" in order to make our way to see such talents as Tom Petty, Nine Inch Nails, Flaming Lips and the Tragically Hip.
Three months from now we will bum our way out of the city, and halfway across the country to the Pemberton Festival 2008.

Yesterday, this involved going to the army surplus store and buying amazing new shorts!
Today this involved spending $300 on tickets to a show we better darn well make it to!
Tomorrow, and the days following, this might involve buying new shoes, packing, repacking, cooking, thinking, jumping around and generally being fools.

Recipe for Disaster

2008-04-01T16:09:00.003-07:00

How to make your friends, family and neighbors hate you, in three simple steps.
Step 1. When your ex-boyfriend tells you he is coming to town, you say, "Sweet, give me a call, maybe we can hang out" and proceed to give him your phone number
Step 2. When your ex-boyfriend, his new girlfriend, and his friend phone you, you agree to meet them for drinks, and upon meeting them, feeling awkward, and wanting to jump off the nearest bridge, start to drink doubles.
Step 3. Invite all three troublesome people back to your apartment to sleep on your floor, I mean, they are from out of town. Take precautions! This step may include, drunk driving, drinking while driving, buying smokes and whiskey, drinking said whiskey out of the bottle, wrestling the new girlfriend to assert your dominance, and insulting your neighbors sexuality in front of his best friend when they won't come over and party with you.

Remember children, these fun and games are for adults only.

Workin'

2008-03-25T16:40:00.002-07:00

These are the things I did at work today:
-Made an appointment for the doctor, I happened to get one today!
- Went home to get my health card and was temporarily distracted by PocketBuddha and The Flintstones
- Came back to work and had a short nap on the floor in the back room
-Helped one customer, and had a longer nap on the floor in the back room
-Dicked around for a short while and then went to the doctor
- Waited, peed in a cup, waited more, got naked, waited more, was poked and prodded, waited, had blood taken
-Took bus back to work and went to buy popcorn
- Ate popcorn and updated my blog
-Hometime in 16 minutes!

Housewife in Training

2008-03-22T16:07:00.003-07:00

We bought a table! And two chairs, four more are on their way. In retrospect, it's funny we went with it at all. Our living room has dark stained wood, so we wanted to go with not only a dark stained table, but a large table, to fill the massive amount of space we have in our apartment.
So, we pick a dark stained pub-style table, with the tall chairs, out from Jysk, patting ourselves on the back and giggling about the deal we got for taking the floor model off their hands for cheap
Well, it just so happens that our dining room walls are painted the same color as the pub.
Funny, we have something else the same color as at the pub too. OUR DINING ROOM FURNITURE!
It's like work, at home!

Karaoke

2008-03-12T09:39:00.003-07:00

Two words which I thought should never coincide are as follows:
Karaoke, and pub.
I love my pubs, I like them dark, sticky and full of mismatched wood furniture.
I love my pubs full of ale, stout, lager, brew, and of course, beer.
I love my pubs most of all when they're full of friends, and I'm full of whiskey.
Which is why, even though I was at first skeptical, I headed down to a different local pub last night, in search of good times and music, the food for my soul.
Somehow this happened with two microphones, and a horrible rendition of "New York, New York" by four people who can only remember half of the words.
Palinode once wrote an article, and had some sort of part in some sort of documentary about Karaoke at a local bar. Bug him about it.
Also, bug me over at Only Slightly Ingenious

Weekend Update

2008-02-28T09:15:00.004-07:00

Just to let you know, I've decided to spend more of my "lazy-time" at work, working on something equally as awesome as slacking off, blogging once more on "Only Slightly Ingenious" So, if your addicted to Etsy, like I know some of us are, I'll feed your habit like my pimp feeds me cocaine.

It doesn't, however, mean I want to spend more time with you. Maybe I'll have a real post later.

Reading Rainbow

2008-02-11T12:53:00.001-07:00

Side note: I totally wrote this post a few days ago, before everybody whom I tagged went ahead and got tagged by others. So, fuck it, I'm not changing it. Deal.

Right now I've taken to reading when I'm bored at work.
Even though I have a very boring job, this doesn't seem to happen very often. Between sneaking onto the interweb to check my email, making fun of my various co-workers through comics, or watching episodes of South Park in the back room, I can't seem to make time for a book. Not to mention, the very moment I pick one up, a customer will probably walk in and want something. Greedy fuckers.
Either way, I do keep a book at work for these rare quiet times, and right now I'm making my way through a collective of short stories by Stuart McLean, whom you may know, is my hero. For you poor souls who know not of the Vinyl Cafe, I will explain.
Stuart writes humorous, outrageous, and strangely touching stories about a family who lives in Toronto, and largely around the husband, Dave.
Dave is a neurotic, clumsy, and often absent-minded, ex-roadie/manager for heavy rock bands, who's settled down with a family and opened "the worlds smallest record store."
Hillarity ensues as you can read, or listen, about him cooking the Christmas turkey, swallowing flys, and getting stuck in the blood pressure chair. Find more about his show here.

Either way, this is a long introduction to a relatively short entry. And by entry, I mean, I was tagged by the lovely Saviabella in a meme, and since she is going in for jaw surgery right away, I will fulfill her wishes by taking part.
The rules given to me are as follows:
Take the nearest book, open to page 123, skip the first five sentances, record the next three, and tag five people.
That's where the long introduction comes in.
Currently my at-work-reading is "The Vinyl Cafe Diaries" by My-Secret-Lover, and page 123 happens to land near the end of the story "Birthday Present" in which Dave hires a caterer for his wifes birthday, only to have the caterer go to the wrong house, clean from top to bottom, and set up for a party in a house where nobody lives.

"There is something liberating about a house without furniture. There is something musical about the voices when they bounce off empty walls. There is something about the way bare wood floors invite people to move-to slip, to slide, to become dancers."

There, doesn't that get you all hot and bothered?
Next!
Pocket Buddha
That Girl Who Blogs Stuff
Wenchwire
The Nervous Axon
Paige Stanton

7 Things about Herpes

2008-02-11T09:41:00.000-07:00

I've got the herpes.
Inter-web-herpes, that is, and there's no way to shake this baby. Like in real life, I could ignore it, but that uncomfortable itch would always haunt me. People I both know and don't know will snicker about me behind my back, calling me that blog slut who just caught it from everybody.
Well, fuck it.
Heres 7 things about me:
1. I've never actually had the herpes. Or any STI's for that matter. But I did have a really bad yeast infection once that required me to not fuck or drink, and I had to eat this absolutely horrendous medicine.
2. I am a pet-addict.
3. Though some cruel, unusual and downright rude things come out of my mouth at times, I generally don't mean to be a horrible person. I have what we have come to refer to as 'verbal diarrhea'
4. I like money way too much. Way way too much. I hoard it relentlessly, and then complain that I'm broke because I am too occupied letting the interest build up in my savings.
5. I pretend I know alot of things about alot of stuff, when in all actuality, I know only a little about alot. The rest is pretty easy to make up, once people believe that your not bullshitting.
6. I've never seen any of the following: Any Star Wars Movie, any Freddy Krugar movie, any Friday the 13th movie, or any Star Trek movie. I do however own all the episodes of the Wonder Woman TV show and have a guilty pleasure of playing my original gameboy that I spent too much money on. My geekness remains the same.
7. One time I peed on a guy during sex. It was completely by accident, and later on he made a remark about how I was "a gusher." I didn't tell him the truth until a year or so later, and then he lied to save face. Pocket Buddha and I still laugh about it.

Point Of No Return

2008-02-05T12:29:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to let you know, I am still alive, I think.
No longer am I merely ignoring the internet, but it has been taken away from me most of the time.
I spend all day at work, with a neato computer that changes colors if I push on the screen (I spend a total of at least 5 minutes a day doing this)
First, there was nothing to do, except make lame-o MS Paint drawings of my various co-workers. Then I was introduced to the hidden Spider Solitaire file, and eventually, I talked my co-worker into installing Mozilla Firefox and hiding the file so deep within the computer that only I, the super genius am able to find it.
My boss still does not know.
P.S As of yesterday, I am their new king. But you can call me Ms. Assistant Manager

Awards

2008-01-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

A few months back I received my most coveted and generous award. I figured now it was only time to pass on said custom-made award to somebody just as deserving as myself, and after much thought and consideration, I will now pull the all-powerful "I'm rubber and you're glue" tactic.
Pocket Buddha has now been blessed with the "Most Politically Incorrect Sarcastic Bitch of the Year Award"
Why? You might ask. Pocket Buddha is so against racism, sexism, douchbagism and other such nonsense. I am here to pull the blind away from your eyes, starting with my very favorite quote:
"The only reason we're alive today is because Hitler hated Jews"
Though you were serious, pointing out that the only reason he didn't use the A-bomb was because Einstein was Jewish, it still comes out all wrong.
Or another personal favorite,
"Yes Annoying-Little-Sister, one hundred Mandarins sit around for one hundred years, rolling oranges on counter tops, just so you can have easy-to-peel oranges at Christmas time" Okay, maybe you were being sarcastic, maybe you were glorifying the slave-labor trade they have going throughout Asia. Either way.
Then thee is the oh-so-recent
"I can't listen to your story right now, that seal is blinking at me"
Animal cruelty isn't right, but look at the sad seal, it's tragic, and there's a sad R.E.M song playing in the background. Don't mock the efforts of millions of people to free bears from clown suits and monkeys from the organ grinders.
Though a day or so ago I had much better examples, all of which seemed to have escaped me, you can clearly see that Pocket Buddha is not all that she seems. Therefor I have drawn a superior MS Paint Drawing of her terrorizing Cityville in a King Kong-like fashion.

Gyno 101

2008-01-10T10:17:00.000-07:00

Dead language my ass! If it wen't for my misunderstanding of latin, I could have scored 100% on this Vagina Trivia hosted by the best website around, Gurl.com.
You'd think that through all the symbology, and all the metaphores, the word vagina would have totaly been dirived from the latin word for 'cup'
I guess not. Clearly those sick sons o' bitches thought that vagina should totaly be dirived from the word "sheath"
Would it be too dirty now to claim that I know vaginas inside and out?

New Tooth

2008-01-08T19:03:00.000-07:00

I'm growing a new tooth!
At first I was confused. A new tooth? I thought I was past this stage in my life, where incisor teeth randomly grow in. Why is this happening now? Is there enough room for it?
Then, I was excited. Woohoo! No more funny looking gap in my teeth! Now I can rip apart raw meat properly like a wolf! No longer will I need to shy away from realistic vampire teeth I can stick in with denture-glue.
Now, I'm pissed off and confused. Not only did my dentist not welcome the tooth with open arms, he told me it was bad! Bad!
"There is no room for this tooth," he told me, "See how it's growing in crooked? See how it's already dissolved the roots of this other tooth?"
I nodded
"This means you will get abscessing, and although we could pull out this half dissolved tooth (which would be the easy and least stressful approach) we will do all sorts of orthodontic work, and use your mouth as a practice piece, and then maybe it will look half decent"

I always thought that people didn't like the dentist because of the pain they inflict. Root canals, braces, fillings, that fucking pick thing that makes you bleed. I can usually grin and bear that shit. Now I realize the true problem. The dentist is an asshole who makes you feel like your mouth and teeth are inadequate, inferior, and just plain shitty. It's like no matter what you do to impress your dentist, you're not doing it right.
"You need to brush right up to the gum line"
"No, don't brush the gum line, you'll have receding gums"
"Don't brush back and fourth"
"Don't brush up and down"
Son-of-a-bitch-bastard.

Smut for All

2007-12-28T21:57:00.001-07:00

I just wanted to let you know, if you missed out on the boobie-button-giveaway I had last month, you need not mope and fear! More smuttons are headed my way, compliments of Mr. Smutons.
Boobs, twats and sex on the rocks are coming to my mailbox, and I will be more than happy to share them with you!
Or you can order your own damn sm ut.
Although, I have to admit, if the buttons actualy had a red bar across them that said, "smut," like it does in the display pictures, I would be just a wee bit more ecstatic.
Oh how I wish I had a button maker.

Wiket

2007-12-28T10:10:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to let you know that I not dead.
See? Not dead!
And I have made a new friend, Commie Wonder Woman, she is sexy, and kicks political ass! She's an inspiration to all fuzzy-legged, feminist hippie-types the world over.
On that note, I have also sent my hammer and sickle wristwatch to be repaired. Which will cost a whopping $60 to replace all the insides, which had apparently rusted apart in the old one. What can I say, it was a $10 watch and I cant seem to find a replacement.
Well, considering I have a full day ahead of waxing my hair, talking to potential landlords, feeding fish, and hanging out with my family, I guess I should put some clothing on.
I guess I could also make a leftover turkey sandwich with mustard. Mmm, mustard.

Zootalo! It is ready!

2007-12-16T22:05:00.000-07:00

Jukebox isn't the only Hero in the house. Give a hand to Smyrish as well, because the two of them have got the computer up and running.
Now I can further ignore my sewing, and continue to play Carmen Sandiago and pretend I am too busy blogging to do important things, like cook dinner, clean the apartment, and get up to use the washroom. Go me!
Also, just for your information, I went to church today. Yes, church.
This was no uptight, glazed-eyed, congregation my friends. This was throw your hands in the air, swing to the beat and sing as loud as humanly possible church, and it was fun. Plus, the sermon was based around fruit. FRUIT!
If I try really hard, I can enjoy myself, and maybe nobody will notice that when I raise my hands to pray, I keep one hand down to pour the positive energy I receive back into the earth. And maybe nobody will notice if I praise the Goddess too.

Time Off

2007-12-10T19:04:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here listening to Blink 182 ('cause I am awesome) and thinking about my business.
Over the past week, I have sold two CD organizers made from LP's, and a ring.
It didn't even occur to me that until the other day, I hadn't made anything new since I started my job. For a month, I have been too busy to sew, too busy to twist around bits of metal, too busy to take photos, and too busy to think about the upcoming festivals of next year.
Yes, I realize those festivals are six months away, but considering how much more stuff we sold this year, than the year before, imagine if I sold that much more next year. I'd be out of stock after the first two days!
As much as I love my job, it makes me consider taking 5-10 hours less a week, making it a full-part-time job. I have this theory in my head that if I spend those extra hours making things, I might be able to sell more on my Etsy shops. Because I'll have more stuff.
Plus you may notice that my new photographs are one-billion times better than the old ones. That is because I am learning, and I spend my day off updating what I had in photographs. Already it has gotten me more views, and a sale!

What do you think? After the holiday season, should I ask for a few less hours a week and see how my business does with a bit more effort?

Night Out

2007-12-09T09:31:00.000-07:00

Last night was spent hangin' with my homies. The lovely Ms. Abigail Road, my partner in crime, hosted a sex toy party, complete with wine, little coffee cakes with chocolate in them, and a brood of wonderful girlfriends we like to call "The Local Pub Ladies Auxiliary"
There was chicks, and dicks, and licks and clits.
Plus, Saviabella brought me my new t-shirt which I mercilessly stripped down in front of all to put on. I wear it proudly on this day as well.
Also, just a tip for you ladies, don't try to drunken craft.

For Lack of a Better...

2007-12-06T22:16:00.000-07:00

Because I am... (pick any of the following)
a) lame
b) lazy
c) in desperate search of friends, acceptance, and the wealth that comes with or
d) all of the above

...I have chosen to do this meme today, which I was tagged by Paige Stanton to do, instead of actually choosing a topic, spending time and effort thinking and writing about said topic, only to make a completely off-topic point.

*ahem*
Music Shuffle Meme

What I need to do is put my iTunes on shuffle, and answer each of the following questions with the name of the first song that pops up, no exceptions. I find this unfair. I have to listen to Jukebox Hero's stinky music nine times out of ten, because he owned this computer for years before ~~he owned me~~, I came along. Whatever. I will also add my own rule, because this is my blog, and I make up rules. I must somehow answer the song using lyrics from said song (actualy, I stole this rule from a similar meme I did a few years ago on an old blog I shall not speak of) I am lying, I'm also going to skip through if I find a song which I do not know.

1. If someone asks, "is this okay?" you respond:
I've got you under my skin-Frank Sinatra.
"don't you know you fool? You never can win! Use your mentality, wake up to reality"

2. What would best describe your personality?
Responsibility-MxPx
"Responsibilty? Whats that? I don't want to think about it...You think I'm so simplistic, I'm onto you and your tricks"

3. What do you like in a guy/gal?
Hell's Bells - ACDC
"I'm coming on like a hurricane"

4. How do you feel today?
I'm all out of love - Air Supply
Fuck off, seriously, Air Supply?!?

5. What is your life's purpose?
Cant Wake Up - Treble Charger
"I'm not trying to make a statement"

6. What is your motto?
Everyday - Buddy Holly
"A-hey, a-hey hey!"

7. What do your friends think of you?
What to do - Buddy Holly
"What to do to keep from being lonely?"

8. What do you think of your parents?
Line and Sinker - Billy Talent
(Yelling, more yelling, chorus, yelling, chorus)

9. What do you think about very often?
Werewolves of London - Warren Zevon
"You better stay away from him, he'll rip your lungs out Jim. Huh, I'd like to meet his tailor"

10. What is 2+2?
If Not Now - Tracy Chapman
"If not today, then why make your promises? A love deeply for days to come, is as good as none"

11. What do you think of your best friend?
Mr. Brightside - The Killers
"is started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this? Now I'm falling asleep, and she's calling a cab"

12. What do you think of the person you like?
Listen to Me - Buddy Holly (whats with this?)
"Hold me darling, listen to closely to me..."

13. Whats your life story?
Welcome - The Who
"Lovely bright home, we're drinking all night, never sleeping. Milkman come in, and you baker, little old lady welcome, and you shoe-maker!"

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?
I've Got My Mind Set on You - George Harrison
"but it's going to take money, a whole lotta spending money, it's gonna take plenty of money, to do it right"

15. What do you think when you see the person you like?
World Go Round - No Doubt
"Wipe the grime off of you, and let's take a closer look"

16. What do your parents think of you?
Tell her Tonight - Franz Ferdinand
"Gonna have to tell her tonight" (thats all I got, really, understanding songs you don't know very well is hard!)

17. What will you dance to at your wedding?
Degenerate - Blink 182
"walk through the street, naked at night...into a barn, to kick some cows..."

18. What till they play at your funeral?
To the One I Love - REM
"This one goes out to the one I love"

19. What is your hobby/interest?
Strategic Grill Locations - Mitch Hedburg
(I got nothing with this one, it's a one and a half hour comedy special by the best comedian ever!)

20. What is your biggest secret?
Man on the Moon - REM
(Again, I got nothing, they just talk about stuff that happened, it's not much of a secret)

21. What do you think of your friends?
Little Wonder - David Bowie
"You little wonder, little wonder you"

What are you still doing here? It's over, go home. Go!

Award Created for Moi

2007-12-02T08:43:00.001-07:00

I was given an award recently. Not only is that pretty cool in itself, but the fact that it was an award created just for me makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Pocket Buddha has given me the Least Politically Correct Sarcastic Bitch award. Here's what she has to say about my wonderfulness.
"her only thoughts about Cityville getting an Ethiopian restaurant were 'I didn't know they had food in Ethiopia'.
Several other's have made similar jokes, but this combined with offhanded comments about killing child labourers for faulty clothing, and suggesting that mentally retarded people make cheep and effective menial job workers, makes her my favorite sarcastic bitch in the whole wide world"
Plus, check out this uber-terrible MS Paint drawing she did of me. Amaaaazing.
I would just like to say, that though I may mock child labor, world hunger, and handicapped people, I don't actually feel that way. It's one of those laugh so you don't cry things.
Cheers!

Summer Lovin' Happens So Fast....

2007-11-27T21:08:00.000-07:00

Why is it that when the snow starts to fall, you suddenly get behind?
I could be on top of it all, new job, sewing like a madman, bloggin' it up in the hiz-ouse, but then the snow falls, and suddenly I'm waking up 1/2 an hour earlier just so I can warm up with a hot shower, and then spend 10 minutes loading up my snow gear to get to work.
Touque, mittens, scarf, sweater, jacket, coffee mug, boot- fuck, I need to take my mitts off...
Who wants to move to Bermuda?

PS - I've totally started calling all my winter accessories "condiments" I love that word

Thats All Folks

2007-11-18T21:55:00.001-07:00

Harrison Ford's Toes

2007-11-14T21:05:00.000-07:00

I love Stuart McLean. I almost love Stuart McLean more than the radio itself, but thats where he lives, in the radio. But this isn't a post about Stuart McLean, but about Harrison Ford, who happens to be a part of a super funny Vinyl Cafe Episode.
Here goes.
Wednesday nights at the public library downtown, they play a free movie. I've gone before to see: A Scanner Darkly (which I loved) The Princess Bride, and Say Anything. In November, they are playing the Indiana Jones movies, which, you must admit, are pretty darn awesome. Tonight was the second movie, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Pure, 1984 cheesy man. Pure cheesy.
I lied.
This post is not about Harrison Ford, but about the stinky homeless man in the back of the theater who yelled "That stunned bitch, he should kick her in the slit" when the blonde, big breasted love interest was failing to save their lives because she was scared of the bugs. Good on you man, I giggled into my fist for the last hour.

What Comes Before Part B?

2007-11-13T08:02:00.000-07:00

As you damn well better know, my birthday is Friday. Friday!
We are having a party, a formal. Why? Why the fuck not?
People have been asking me, "Can I wear this? I dont want to buy something new. Blah blah"
Think about it this way, it is a formal birthday party at the local pub. Silly concept, Silly clothes.

Pseudo-Celebrity Sighting

2007-11-11T00:40:00.000-07:00

Today I was at Local Pub, minding my own business. This, in itself, is very hard to do on a Saturday night. Not only is there skanky bar stars, but asshole jocks, Sports Center broad-casted onto the wall, and a disco ball going. Either way, I am going out for a smoke with some buddies, fighting our way through an impossible crowd, when I see It. Leopard print leggings, shiny gold shirt, and a pair of hideously ugly, mock-cowboy boots. I turn to a friend and say, "Look at that, kids these days, really now" and puke in my mouth a little as I continue to push my way through a crowd of barely-legal hoochies.
Later, I find out, the girl with the bad fashion sense, is Micha Barton.
Okay, okay. So the scary little zombie girl from the Sixth Sense, is scaring me in my own Local Pub. I am not nearly kidding when I tell you, she looked like she mugged a hooker.
Don't famous people hire consultants to tell them they look like trailer-trash from the mid-eighties?
I'm sorry baby, but only Bowie could pull this off.

Holy Crap! Siamese Twins!

2007-11-10T16:18:00.000-07:00

I have taken the advice of many, and decided, I won't torture the readers of my regular blog, day in and day out with talk of crafts, and crafters, and shiny things I can make other things out of.
No, I have put my foot down, clicked the mouse, and a this separatist blog. The Quebec of my blog, if you will. It wants to break away, and be different, but still leach from it's parent-blog. Not unlike a 14 year old.
Either way. We shall begin.
The first thing I am going to do, is re-start the 90-day-challenge.
Find me here and there.

Pearls Before Swine

2007-11-09T07:55:00.000-07:00

Look! This very funny and ingenious comic totally describes the way I blog!
I love Pearls Before Swine. It is the funniest comic on this this of Calvin and Hobbes. Everyday I look forward to checking my email, because every morning I get a new one of these to start the day off with a giggle. From the silly pig, to the stupid crocodiles, all the way to the frat boy lions, the personification of animals (that was a 25 cent word) is always always funny.

Also, check out GiftBearer. She makes some pretty amazing looking jewelry. I love jewelry that looks like nature. I've seen brushed silver cuffs that look like wood or leaves, and I love them. She's got this which I just love. Read her here!

Also, I've been checking out the other challengers blogs, and have realized, I am subpar. I am trying to ride the fine line of "Bad Blogging" and "Craft Obsessed Blogging" It's hard, when all the other people out there have pictures and prices posted, and I'm still trying to find time every day!

Game Over: User Wins

2007-11-07T18:40:00.000-07:00

I started my new job yesterday, selling slippers at the kiosk. After two hours, I was contemplating suicide, so I'm super glad that I get to work in the store from now on, selling shoes that look so comfortable I just want to have a nap on them. And crocs. But I'll ignore the crocs, and focus on the soft, leather, suede and wool shoes and boots that cost the entire right half of my body. So nice, so nice. And! In other news...
Look, two days on the job and I already missed a spot. I deffinatly forgot to do my duty, and dropped the ball on some poor etsian, who I did not feature.
So I will feature her today.
Meet Kuddle Bugs Threads, where you can buy all things baby! From soft fleece hats to custie little booties, they have everything you need for a wee little one.
Check out this blanket, it's got ribbons for playing with!
Ribbons! And they're probably made out of that gross material that I hate to touch, the one thats all crinkly, and kids can't get enough of it? Yeah, that stuff.
Check out her blog too.

I've Found My Own Drug...

2007-11-05T10:15:00.000-07:00

Screw NaBloPoMo, I've found my own once a day habit that I don't want to break.
I've signed up to get some, and give some, extra exposure for Etsy shops everywhere. In every post for the next 90 days (take that, National Blog Posting Month, mines bigger) I will link to a different shop in each post. Also, cool thing, 90 other people will link to me. Yay!
So I'll end, or begin, or whatever I feel like, each post with a sentence or two about a neato etsian.
*ahem*
Meet StudioMarcy she makes neato lampwork glass figuring beads that I could never have the patience to put so much detail into. These make good necklaces, either solo, or as a centerpiece. You can also see her blog.

Special Note: I went one whole day without talking about etsy on my blog. I demand my hero cookie

A Promise is a Promise

2007-11-04T12:04:00.000-07:00

I promised this blog wouldn't be about crafts or selling, so I'm doing a Meme instead that I stole from Abigail Road and Madame Diva. The Questions:

What is the first music album you remember owning? If not the same, what is the first music album you purchased for yourself?

I'll be fickle and sort it into categories.
My first cassette tape was a mix tape that I danced to in the basement all the time, I believe I stole it from my sister. It consisted of Beach Boys and that annoying "Hands Up, Baby Hands Up" song that I loved.
My first CD was Tragic Kingdom by No Doubt.
My first vinyl was the soundtrack from Alice and Wonderland, but I won't count that, I bought two at once, The Pros and Cons of Hitchhiking by Roger Waters, and Ummagumma by Pink Floyd. I bought so many records (and mostly Floyd records) in a short period of time, I cant remember which ones came first.

What artist currently occupies the most space either in terms of shelf space or megabytes on your hard drive?

Pink Floyd, and, yes I'll admit it, AFI. Old AFI, before people liked them, when they were fun and punk rock, not so emo I want to puke.

How many different types of music media (vinyl, cassette, CD, etc) have you owned in your lifetime?

Cassettes, LP's, 45's, CD's, MP3s...

Who or what has had the biggest effect on your music taste?
My dad has awesome music taste, awesome, but then I started dating a boy like four years ago who liked Pink Floyd, and since then I've loved anything classic rock. My best friend is a stinky hippy, so thanks to her I like folk. And thanks to my partner in crime, I am getting more into the dancin' classics, random shit, oldies, newies, indies, and i dunno, I wanted something else to rhyme

How do you currently prefer to listen to music?

Loudly. Computer, stereo, headphones, whatever.

In terms of music memorabilia, what is your most prized possession?

Again, my cool dad, gave me every single bootleg of a Pink Floyd concert that he could find. I also own all of their CD's. If you combine these, they equal more than 80.

Have you ever "swapped headsets" with a complete stranger (meaning have you ever unplugged the earphones from your listening device and plugged them into someone else's player and had them do the same)? If yes, what did they play for you?

No, but Pocket Buddha and I always share headphones while listening to embarrassing music when we walk places.

Have you ever been completely obsessed with a particular artist? Who and to what level did your fandom go?

AFI, I owned all their CD's, I wrote their lyrics all over my binder and body, and t-shirts. I used to carry around a binder specifically for them, I would print out the lyrics to all of their songs, and then I would go through and highlight the words that described how I feel at that moment. I was the original emo.

What is the farthest you've ever traveled for a concert?

Um, 10 minutes?

Who have you seen in concert the most?

Dude, I don't think I've ever seen anybody more than once. Maybe some punk bands when I went to the punk shows. I will modify this question. I haven't gone to as many shows as I would like to think I've been to.

What are the most famous bands you've seen?
If the musical profuction of RENT doesn't count, I went to The Casualties, AFI, Ani Difranco, Uta Philips, Green Day and... Planet Smashers? I am such a failure.

Edit. I am so through with trying to figure out the font sizes on this piece of shit. Blogger, I haete you. You goat eating, smelly, mother fucking piece of wanker shit eating fuck.

Lookit!

2007-11-02T10:18:00.000-07:00

Being awake for over 40 hours can, in fact, be a good thing every now and then.
I started my Etsy shop for my clothing, purses and jewelry, and somehow everything else fell into my lap, and now it is a messy shop full of random things, I feel like a flea market.
So I started a new shop! This shop is dedicated to all things I make out of reused LP's. Purses, CD Books, Sketchbooks... I haven't decided if I should put the bowls up there or not, I think they would be less than fun to ship.
So I had an idea, I had a product, but I didn't have a name, and a name is important. I needed something catchy, easy to remember, and descriptive. I wanted to incorporate either: Vinyl, Record or LP into the name, but was having some difficulty. It may have been the mismatched wiring in my brain after two days without sleep, but I giggled to myself as I thought "ReVinylized"
Tee-Hee.
I promise my next entry will NOT be about my online shops.

Uh-Oh

2007-10-29T20:11:00.000-07:00

I took a pledge today. Scary thought, isn't it, that strangers online might somehow find out if I secretly buy something that wasn't handmade. Even if it's just like an orange or something.
No, I'm going to stick to my guns, this season, all you fuckers are getting from me is handmade stuff. Be it locally made, crafted, grown, shat, or whatever, thats what you get.
But thats cool right?I will now explain to you why you should take the pledge.
-boost the crafters/growers/artists ego (it feels good to make sales)
-put money directly into the pockets of those who deserve it
- give thoughtful, planned gifts, not what you found last minute at the bargin mart
- Support awesome people like me.

Out of Ideas

2007-10-29T09:21:00.000-07:00

What qualifies a Canadian
A rugged attitude to match the Rockies?
A tasteless, boring sense of humor to match the flat grasslands?
Possibly a mosaic of culture,
And acceptance of others,
To match the patchwork of trees, crops and fields.
A calm, placid, cool sense of dignity,
to go with freshwater lakes, books and creeks.
Along with enough energy to correspond with raging rivers and waterfalls.
Maybe Canadian Identity exists after all.
Multigrain,
Like most breads.
And sometimes even bagels.

2007-10-23T13:58:00.000-07:00

(to the tune of "My Darling Clementine"

Manic Mondays, are a fun day,
I got fired from my job!
It's so funny, how they fuck me,
Yet they act like nothings wrong!

All my hard work, all my hard work,
all my hard work gone to waste!
I will be there laughing softly,
when the new boss loses face.

I have a new job, not a food job,
which is all I want from life.
No more bad quality clothing,
Made from Indonesia's strife.

It's so funny, it's so funny,
when I think how long I stayed.
I'll be happy, not so crappy,
Selling new shoes out of suede!

Candlied Apples for All.

2007-10-21T11:54:00.000-07:00

I have received this prestigious award from my new blogger buddy, Paige Stanton.

I am touched, really, everybody knows theres nothing better than a candied apple. Except maybe a candlied apple. These make me feel all warm and sticky inside. I never know what to do with them. Candle, apple... are these like wax-lips? Because I never understood those either. They're wax! How are these in the candy section? Whatever!

Like the last award I was given, I need to spread this like the herpes. But this time, the instructions specifically give it to random people, because we're all internet whores on the inside.

This reminds me of the fine summer day a few months ago, when I was sitting at Local Pub drinking with some fine friends, and a drugged out hooker came onto the patio and lifted up her skirt, walking up to tables, showing off her snatch. When she was kicked off the patio, she yelled that we were all sluts, giving it away for free. I guess she's right.

Either way, the originator of this award, Hootin' Anni wants me to give this award out to five people who comment to me. Thats right, this is a ploy to prove that I have online friends. Comment away, and maybe you can be as sweet as a candlied apple too.

Punk Shows and Drunk Shows

2007-10-14T11:56:00.000-07:00

Ahh, live music.
I'm a folksy kinda girl, but I learned to dance in the circle pit at punk shows.
My dance has evolved from the circle pit to the sand pit, but a few things have remained the same:
1. Attitude: Dancing should be awesome, spontaneous and fun. What the fuck is choreography? I don't want to copy what I saw some skank do in a movie. I want to virtually embarrass myself in front of people who don't give a shit about the way I dance. So I tripped you, so I fell down. Who cares?
2. Self Defense: At punk shows, when the music really gets going, you need to throw a few elbows to keep yourself upright. Sometimes you hit people, sometimes you don't. They wont hold it against you if you crack their ribs or stomp their feet. I used to go into the circle pit specifically to get beat up. At folk shows, I still throw elbows, in a more graceful, non violent sort of way. I don't want to beat up hippies, it's just a move thats stayed with me since my early teens.
3. Timing: I don't know when to stop. I never know when to stop. I've been a smoker since before I started going to shows, and let me tell you, if the set's not done, I'm probably not going anywhere, especially if it's an indoor show and I have to go outdoors to smoke. One of these days I'll need to be scraped off the floor, but I'll still be trying to giv'er.

The moral of this story is:
Dance like no one is watching, because, nobody probably is. Also, if they are, thats creepy and judgmental, or else they just are trying to figure out how darn cool you are.
also: dreadlocks get really really really itchy when you sweat, and scratching will not help.
also: I should go to way way way more shows, last night was awesome

Werks fer Jerks

2007-10-12T17:18:00.000-07:00

I hate my job.
I want to quit, and work from home and tell everybody there to go fuck themselves.
I'll buy a bunch of fabric, and sew all day long. It'll be wonderful! I can hang out at home all day, listen to music, sing along, not have to buy a lunch, and not be bossed around or deal with real people, just internet people.
I'd have extra time to take better photos of my stuff, so more people would buy it! Right?
I could be my own boss, I wouldn't get in shit for silly reasons, and I could be as creative as I want.
I have enough money saved up to pay my rent for the next few months while I get started.
Clearly, I have thought everything through.

Or maybe I just need a part-time job. I don't need to be able to pay for food, or clothes, or bus tickets, or god-forbid, beer. Right?

Basicaly, I got in trouble at work today. I don't normaly get a chance to take my break, because the stores either really busy, or I'm really busy... so I just go home early. Balances out. No hour break, I leave at 4. Right?
Apparently my boss doesn't believe the part about me not getting lunch. But she does believe the part about me going home early. So basically, I've been accused of time-theft, and they're taking stupid amounts of money off my next paycheque that they claim I stole from them, when really... I was too busy working my ass off to eat.
Fuckers, I'm going to go to Local Pub and drink away my worries.

Bye Bye Burlap.

2007-10-10T08:09:00.000-07:00

There goes the last of the burlap.
And by last of, I mean I have one left, and I'm debating keeping it for myself. My Cindy Lauper LP purse may be trashed soon enough.
In other news, I have nothing. I just wanted to show off.

No Thanks for Thanks

2007-10-08T09:09:00.000-07:00

Today, is the day I have been waiting for for about four years.
Today, I get to eat my dad's home made chili, and I am thankful for that! My dad makes chili so hot, that even I cannot eat it unless I am eating it on a bun or some rice. This chili includes habinaro pepper juice, four different kinds of hot sauce, and about six different types of peppers. Not to mention spicy pepperoni, beans, vegetables and the perfect consistency of the saucy, brothy stuff. This is like sex on a plate, an orgasm in your mouth, if you will, only... better tasting.
I haven't gotten to eat my dad's chili since before he moved to Calgary when I was in grade 9. That was in 2003. I bought him a tiny pepper plant.
Also, last night my sister made really good beef on a bun. The beef came apart when you touched it, and there were onions and celery!
Coming from the girl who was a vegetarian for two years, I've really come a long way.

Land Mass - Bitch

2007-10-03T10:02:00.000-07:00

I was a land mass.
I was seeping, seething locks of seaweed grass
I was a landmass.
I was a beautiful boobed mountain pass.
I was a landmass
And floating.

Weekend

2007-10-01T13:06:00.001-07:00

What a good weekend it has been.
I sold a tie skirt, a purse and a pair of earrings on my Etsy Shop!
I also watched a funny movie.
Also, Abigail Road, Smyrish and I went to the Pumpkin Festival in Craven and took a tour of the greenhouses in the area. Somwhere along the 20 minute drive out of the city, we became 60 year old people who have nothing better to do on a Sunday afternoon than drive around to 5 different greenhouses in the country. But it was a good day, we bought pumpkins, and baby potatoes, and found a garage sale which sold us a folding screen for $3.
To end the night on a great note, we stopped by the pub, drank some beers and went on an adventure for East Indian food at a newer restaurant none of us had been to. It was great.
Also, today I received my Bitch and Animal CD, which I have been impatiently waiting for for two weeks. Now I just need to wait for my Bitch CD and I will be one very happy cabbage.

Whoopeedo!

2007-09-29T16:16:00.001-07:00

I stole.
I stole from Pocket Buddha. I stole her idea, and now I have replaced my computer chair with a yoga ball.
Even though it was not technically my computer chair, and, in all fairness, the yoga ball can do so much more. We can work out with it. We could have sex with it. We can improve our posture and abdominal muscles with it.
Hopefully Jukebox Hero won't mind that it's pink.

LAME!

2007-09-25T20:25:00.001-07:00

This is how lame I am. I was SO bored that I created a MYSPACE PAGE for my ETSY ACCOUNT.
On the other hand, now you can relive the 80's with an LP purse made from a Quiet Riot record.
Also coming: Alice In Wonderland, The Jungle Book, Strawberry Shortcake, The Village People and Tom Jones!
I have to admit, I am a little bit of wonderful.
And if anybody wants tomatoes, let me know! I have one-hundred-billion!

I say "tomato" you say "tomato"

2007-09-24T09:04:00.000-07:00

I am now the proud owner of about 10 pounds of giant, homegrown, mutant, organic tomatoes. (Courtesy of my dad's new mother in law)
Red tomatoes, green tomatoes, yellow tomatoes. I don't much care for fresh tomatoes, so I am calling upon you, the readership to help me.
I need recipes. Recipes for something fun.
Tomato soup, tomato sauce, tomato paste, whatever.
TOMATOS!

Heterosexual Girl Crush!

2007-09-19T09:02:00.001-07:00

Okay, I'll admit it, I have the biggest heterosexual girl crush ever, on Bitch.
a) She is hot. Really hot.
b) Her music rocks my socks. She is very accutatly described as "The punk artist, little sister of all her folk goddess heros"
c) Her song lyrics are uber-strong and feminist.
d) She was in the film Shortbus. I'm sorry, a strong, feminist woman in a dykey orgy movie? Hello!
e) She plays a UKULELE! How can you not have a crush on someone who can play the ukulele? And the electric violin? And the bass guitar? Her girlfriend, Daniela Sea (from The L Word) must be, the luckiest gal in the world.
If you didn't in the other post, listen to her music here.
Really now.

Oh How I Love...

2007-09-18T21:28:00.000-07:00

I love the thrill of posting a new item on Etsy, waiting a few minutes, and staring at the mainpage as the new items are uploaded. Look! Theres mine! It gives me that warm fuzzy feeling.

Yes! I am finally putting some new items up. I'm kinda lazy, and though I have tonnes of stuff laying around my house, I just haven't gotten around to the photo taking, uploading, cropping, resizing thing yet. It just seems like so much work when I put it like that.
Plus I am not particularly good at taking photos of my merchandise. Not only can I not seem to focus the camera, but when I do, I make allot of twitches and jumps and the flash seems to go off whenever I don't want it to.

Either way, I just wanted to share a few of the things I took photos of today. These should make their way into my shop as the week progresses (It's hard to not post all my items right away)
I made some great earrings with some cool ceramic (I believe) beads in a tortoise shell pattern.
And of course, most of you have seen my record books.

I have to admit...

2007-09-17T12:53:00.001-07:00

"I was watching Oprah yesterday, and Gloria Steinem came on to say-"
"Gloria Steinem, who's Gloria Steinem?"
"Gloria Steinem is a famous feminist, she says there's no separation between housewife and feminist. She says you can be a housewife and a feminist"
"Really?"
"All you housewives can be, famous feminists just like me. Now I'm cooking the vegi's and valuing myself!"

I have to admit. I am a little excited about the presents I bought myself last night when I was bored and riding the internet wave. A year or so back, Pocket Buddha introduced me to Bitch and Animal who totally rock my socks.
Finaly, I brought myself around to ordering their CD off Righteous Babe Records, which is Ani Difranco's label.
I also did some snooping and found out that since they broke up, they have each been producing music. Which brings me to my other point. I ordered Bitch's new album online. Take a listen to the sample songs.
I am so excited for the mail!

Holy Crap

2007-09-17T11:35:00.000-07:00

I am almost looking forward to going back to work. I could have used the last 5 days to, do something. I haven't made anything new since the beginning of August. AUGUST! Thats over a month ago. The next folk festival isn't until next May. Something in my head is telling me "You have lots of time to get ready for the festival. Why start now? You'll just have too much"

But the rest of my head is telling me "Start! Make more! If you don't put something new on your Etsy, you'll never make that second sale! Then you can naver quit your horrible job to stay home and craft all day. And if you never succeed in that, you'll lead a terribly boring life with no creative outlet"

When I finaly decide to get of my arse and make something, there is always a problem. I kid you not when I tell you that a week ago I was all gung-ho to make a new purse, I cut the fabric, cleared the mountain fo garbage off my sewing machine, I started to sew and quit because it wasn't threaded.

A Round of Thanks

2007-09-15T10:03:00.000-07:00

As some of you might know, Smyrish and I lost a little brother this week.
I don't really quite know what to say yet, other than it's been hard.
Our mom is in Europe, and we weren't quite sure how to make the phone call.
Our close family has never really dealt with death. All of our grandparents are alive and kicking, and I think the maximum number of funerals we have each been to totals around two.
I just wanted to say thank you to all of our friends, who really are like family, for all the love and support they have given us over the last few days.

Filler

2007-09-12T19:18:00.000-07:00

Another Episode of "It's Time to Come Clean"
Also today, check out Abigail Road and WenchWire
1. Remember a couple of months ago when I would break pregnant pauses with the phrase "I like muffins" It was a sham. I don't like muffins nearly as much as people assumed I did. I do enjoy muffins, but rarely, and even then. I am still picky about it
1.5. On that note, I have replaced that phrase with "I enjoy taquitos" Which is not a lie. I really do enjoy taquitos, let it be known though, that they do not contain a substantial amount of anything but cardboard and glue, so I don't eat them often.
2. The other day I bought an ice-cream-cake. I ate it. The whole thing. Actually, thats a lie, I gave Jukebox Hero a piece.
3. I eat popcorn in bed at least three times a week. Even though it does not contain a substantial amount of anything but butter, I do eat it often
4. I am horrible at spending money. I spend more of it than I think I have.
5. You know how I tell everybody how awesome I am? And then I come clean and tell people that I only act like a self-centered, stuck up bitch because deep down, I really hate myself and just want a way to feel good? It's a lie. I am just awesome
6. I am addicted to celebrity gossip. In line at the grocery store I long to hold up the line while reading US Weekly. On slow days when I worked at Superstore, I would read the National Enquirer for a good laugh. Now I am addicted to Perez Hilton
7. I hate strangers. I will make fun of them at all costs, just because I can. And I don't care, because they don't know me.
8. I cant figure out how to clean my room. I think this is because I spend my day working with clothes. Why deal with them when I get home?
9. Even though I am a greedy, money hungry, anal retentive chick, I find it hard to get motivated to make anything for next year's folk festivals. Even though I want to try and hit a third.
10. I thought there were more bad habits and horrible things I could write about myself. But I guess I am just that awesome.

*disclaimer. I do not actually think I am better than everybody I don't know. I just am

Almost Famous

2007-09-10T09:01:00.000-07:00

On the sly, I work for a local film company.
This is a terribly low budget, slacker sort of company, that doesn't pay their rent on time, employs absent minded people, makes terrible TV shows (which somehow wind up on the air) and every now and then doesn't pay their employees. But they have really nice offices.
The Palinode used to work there.
Every now and then, this company does something right.
But I digress. The point of this post is to tell you that I am famous.
Smyrish told me about a week ago that he had seen my name in the credits for one of the TV shows that I work on. My name was broad casted around the globe on History Television.
How exciting.

Poor, poor excuse of a post.

Etsy Wetsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

2007-09-09T00:36:00.000-07:00

Check out this neato website where I can talk about how awesome my Etsy is.
The ad's on the site are super as well, because they are hosted by Project Wonderful, which is a community ad space. Basically they set up a system where you bid for the ad space. I set it up so that it automatically increases bid for me, so that if someone says, "Well, I think I will bid $3.20 for my ad to be put here" the website will raise that bid to $3.30, and if I win, my ad will stay.
I don't have to be a millionaire for people to come and not by stuff from me.
Awesome!

Make Someone's Day, Give a Fuck

2007-09-01T16:30:00.000-07:00

Summer will just not let go.
I am very okay with this. Even though I've been at work all day, it's still warm out when I go home. I can spend hours on the patio, taking in the last of the days heat, drinking vodka. I can almost forget that winter is coming, and soon we'll be bundled inside of Local Pub, taking 3 minute smoke breaks, saving that stinky last half in our packs for later.
So since I've been taking a break from the internet, I will amuse you with a great picture that The Palinode drew one winters day about a year ago.
I remember walking into the pub and seeing him and Schmutzie giggling over a drawing on the back of a free postcard. They have a rack of free postcards at Local Pub. The postcards are basically just advertisements for businesses, but they are free, and make good scrap paper. Plus they can be mailed.
But I digress.
Schmutzie and Palinode were explaining to Jukebox Hero and I that this was a picture of a man who was giving a fuck.
They figured that a fuck would be a wet, jelly-type mass. By the picture here, is looks kind of like peat moss jello. It would be heavy enough, that by lifting it, it would sag in the center, but solid enough that it wouldn't just spill everywhere.
So thats for you guys. Just to let you know that even though I am having a blog-fart, I really do give a fuck.

Hiatus

2007-08-26T15:28:00.000-07:00

I've been hiding, semi-kinda-sorta for the past week. I've been on a long journey, to find out what has happened to the sun.
Lately it has been, rainy, overcast, and windy, which is not what I want from August, even if it is nearing the end. I seem to remember it still being nice out for the first few weeks of school, and school is coming up quicker than I would like to admit.
Last week I redid the storefront with denim, sweaters, and those stupid , reversible nylon vests.
I guess, growing up in the prairies, I should be used to the cycle by now. Two months of summer, eight months of cold and two months of in-between.

On a happier note, today I started posting some more of my stuff on Etsy.com. I am thinking this time instead of posting all of it at once, I might do one piece every few hours, so that I will always pop up with having something new.
I also have photos of Abigail Road's wares, which I will be posting along with my own.

Edit: Here is some of the lovely and talented Abigail Road

Coming or Going?

2007-08-19T18:34:00.000-07:00

And this is the end to a great weekend.
Friday and Saturday were filled with costumes, parties, liquor and hugs. Two friends are leaving, one for across the country, one for across the world. Cheers to those who seek for more fun and knowledge in life, as opposed to those who sit around planning for the day they will float away in the wind.

Not to mention other cool things happening, like Jukebox Hero coming for a visit, buying a humongous new 75 gallon fish tank for Ra's Al Ghul, my 5 hour "relationship" with Das Piper (by which I became his fake girlfriend) and dressing in costumes.
Costume parties should happen more often, this was a dead celebrity party. We had sexy Marilyn Monroes, Courtney Love (because she's dead inside) Johnny Cash, Hunter S Thompson, Indira Gandhi, and Joey Ramone (who later became Howard Stern)
Clearly, because I wouldn't have had it any other way, I was Audrey Hepburn. There will be some deadly photos to come I hope, because I looked hot. So hot that Courtney Love spilled beer all over herself while she was groping my boobies. Thats class, all the way.

Award for NICE?

2007-08-15T20:36:00.001-07:00

Apparently I have been awarded by Abigail Road for my niceness.
Thats right. In fact, that was downright nice of her.
I am apparently supposed to pass this around, like genital herpes or the clap, only instead of swelling, itching and green fluids, shiny, neon colored sparkles will fall out of my various orfaces as I flit and float around the internet, searching for my next vict- I mean, more nice people like me.

I am being hasty. I am flattered to get an award from my friend, in-law and partner in crime. Who just does happen to be wonderful and talented.
Now it is my turn to pass on the love.

Pocket Buddha - Like Abigail said, you are a pretty wonderful lady. You bring greetings of trail mix and kiwis, and are now my new business partner, with Greetings from Aunt Flow. Now it is time for you to show everyone how nice you can be, by posting. Go fourth and post!

That Girl who Blogs Stuff - You also are pretty nice, and you have proven that this weekend by hanging out with us smelly hippies this weekend at the Folk Festival. I hope to see you around more, both on the interweb and at Local Pub.

WenchWire - Clearly you deserve this prestigious award. You are always around to offer helpful advice, or an anecdote to go along with any problem or scenario. Your funny, caring, and just plain neat.

What Pent up Rage?

2007-08-14T22:21:00.000-07:00

Scary hey?
Clearly the wonderful new line of "PMS Apology Cards" Which is being put out by my wonderful friend PocketBuddha (who's blog has just been born, give her awhile to sort it out) and I will soar us to new heights of success.
Greetings From Aunt Flow, which can be found on my Etsy Shop will be the most wonderful, and useful line of cards on the planet, maybe even the galaxy.
When my printer stops printing all of my photos in sea foam green.
Clearly the next time you throw the cat at your significant others head when he offers you a hot water bottle, you need one of our cards.
Coming soon: "Congratulations on your first period" cards, featuring disgruntled looking 13 year olds.
Maybe even: "Here come the hot flashes" with Grandma staring back at you with a single tear rolling down her soft doughy cheeks.

Gettin' my Folk on.

2007-08-13T09:21:00.000-07:00

This was a pretty okay Folk Festival.
Considering that I only recall going to three, this was a pretty okay one.
Some really good musicians came out to play, some really great people visited us all weekend at our booth.
People including the lovely: Saviabella, Schmutzie, That Girl, and other non-internety people. Everybody came bearing love. Huge pots of homemade spaghetti, bags of spits, fruit, trail mix, smoothies, chocolate covered bananas. Not to mention the day of stinky farts from the Mexican and East Indian food vendors.
It's nice to make a bit of money from what you make. It's nice to see people who bought things from you last year come back and look at your new items. It's even nicer to hang out in a park with your friends and listen to live music from bands and musicians like: Sarah Sleen, Blue Rodeo, Bruce Cockburn, and Kyrie Kristmanson. Not to mention many other bands playing African music, Cuban music, Folk Music, and just plain old rock music.
It was a slow weekend, because the festival coordinators decided to hike the price up to ridiculous amounts, so all the festival goers were broke, but it was a fun weekend, and I'm liking that a little more.
My partner in crime, Ms. Abigail Road may swing by later so we can split our earnings, have a laugh and take some pictures of her things, so we can throw them on my etsy shop (which is of course, back in service now that the festivals done)

Wouldn't it be nice if we were older?

2007-08-09T18:56:00.000-07:00

This has been the funnest summer in the history of all existence.
And considering my existence is only 19 years old, thats pretty flippin' good.
Every other weekend involved either camping, or folk festivals. Sometimes both.
Last weekend we went camping again, in the same park we went for July long weekend. Beautiful. I brought home some new pet frogs, and totally got wasted with Abigail Road on Baha Rosa.
This week was a short week for me, and tomorrow is the great and wonderful Cityville Folk Festival, which includes a booth by yours truly.
I have been trying to be a good girl and stay home and get ready, but it is so hard when it it hot outside and fun times at Local Pub are waiting.
Although, I finished off a cute purse, and became adventurous in making a new tie-up shirt today.
I totally faux-embroidered a dragonfly onto it. It is pretty darn super. Too bad it would fit like, a 10 year old.
Wish us luck this weekend. Hopefully the weather is sunny, warm and only slightly breezy. Is that too much to ask?

Sharing the Love...

2007-08-02T00:31:00.000-07:00

Look what I just received from my very first, and so far only, customer on my Etsy shop!

"I did receive the bag and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. Seriously, I have gotten more compliments on this bag than any other that I have. And I have tons more. But this is the cutest!!!!!! I carry it everywhere. You did an awesome job!!!"

You can't get much better feedback than that.

I have to admit though, I am getting a little obsessed with my shop. The lovely Schmutzie made me a button (that I might need to get my hands on) for her sidebar. The invitation is still open to miss Abigail Road to throw some of her things my way for all to see. And how great is shameless self promotion?

Camping Sweaters

2007-08-01T10:02:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to turn my head from the fact that summer is coming to an end.
First it was getting boxes upon boxes of jeans into work, then it was the arrival of the sweaters last week. Sweaters! Who in their right mind would buy sweater in July? These are the same ones we got in sometime in December. And they've been selling, I don't know why.
People are complaining, everywhere you go about the hot weather, the humidity, the way it cannot be escaped. I love this! In the prairies, we get maybe three weeks of truly hot weather a year. And in a province where the temperature can drop to -45 degrees, I would like to enjoy my +35 degree weather, by having a drink on the patio a Local Pub, and maybe a quirky conversation or two.
Clearly, these people who buy sweaters in July are robots.

Although, to take advantage of this hot hot, sweater-less weekend, I am deffinatly going to go camping (again) It seems that every other weekend has been camping capable. This weekend we're back off to Small Town to set up until Monday, when we have to come back to the real world.
So far I've been promised beach, mini-golfing, ice cream and skinny dipping.

This bringing me to my real point. I am kind of glad, in a way, that summer is ending. Not once since May, have I gotten a full, 80 hour paycheque. Not one time, and I am on salary, they do not like my summer hours. And I've almost been fired for taking so many Saturdays off.
Oh well, fuck 'em.

HappyNess

2007-07-25T09:09:00.000-07:00

So the Ness Creek Folk Festival was a complete blast.
Live music every night, workshops during the day, crazy vegan organic hippie food, and hitchhiking to the beach.
It was wonderful.
Wednesday, we prepared. Our friend borrowed her sisters Jeep Cherokee, and we spend hours with many bottles of tempera paint, making hand prints, drawing flowers, painting small children so they could in turn paint the Jeep. We were riding in style.
We spent 7 hours on Thursday driving around, forgetting tickets, getting lost, and listening to music from the past. We got there at 6 and set up camp. Not too late of course to miss out on the music, which starts every night at 7 and runs until 2. First night was locals night, Saskatchewan artists galore.
Plus, C.R. Avery, who most deffinatly beatboxed, played the harmonica, and sang, you guessed it, Bob Dylan. Clearly, we were meant for each other.
Friday we hitchhiked out to the beach, spent some time in the water with the football, played some badminton and ate some delicious greek red lentil soup.
When we crammed four people into the back trunk-section of the van, as well as a person in each of the seats, we were ready for another night of dancing and music. (They most deffinatly have a sand pit in front of the stage for dancin')
Saturday we made a spontaneous irrational decision, and all three of us got wonderful, beautiful, free-lovin' dreadlocks. This of course, took all day.
With a sad, and stinky ride back, Sunday was a day for drinking the rest of the liquor, finishing off the dreadlocks, realizing we no longer owned the shoes we took out there, and reading Harry Potter aloud.
I cant wait until next year.